Militantplatypus

In Shakespeare’s time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes, the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase, “goodnight, sleep tight”.

A philosophy professor stood before his class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks, about 2″in diameter. He then asked the students if the jar was full? They agreed that it was.

So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course, rolled into the open areas between the rocks. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He then asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with an unanimous – yes.

The professor then produced two cans of beer from under the table and proceeded to pour their entire contents into the jar – effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

“Now,” said the professor, as the laughter subsided,”I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The rocks are the important things – your family, your partner, your health, your children — things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, your car. The sand is everything else. The small stuff.”

“If you put the sand into the jar first,” he continued “There is no room for the pebbles or the rocks.”

“The same goes for your life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out dancing. There will always be time to go to work, clean the house, give a dinner party and fix the disposal. Take care of the rocks first –the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.”

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the beer represented.

The professor smiled. “I’m glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there’s always room for a couple of beers.”

In Microsoft Windows

• Create a New folder ( you can right click inside any folder, or on your desktop, select ‘New’ then ‘Folder’)
• Try to name the folder ‘CON’, without the quotes

And one more, just cause..

1. Open an empty notepad file
2. Type “Bush hid the facts” (without the quotes)
3. Save it as whatever you want.
4. Close it, and re-open it.

via itb

A million seconds is 13 days.
A billion seconds is 31 years.
A trillion seconds is 31,688 years.

via dd

So, these made me laugh last night. they are from the book sex, drugs, and cocoa puffs. Chuck Klosterman says these are the 23 questions he asks everyone before he can decide whether or not he ‘really loves them’- Tim Saylor

1. Let us assume you met a rudimentary magician. Let us assume he can
do five simple tricks – he can pull a rabbit out of his hat, he can
make a coin disappear, he can turn the ace of spades into the Joker
card, and two others in a similar vein. These are his only tricks and
he can’t learn any more; he can only do these five. HOWEVER, it turns
out he’s doing these five tricks with real magic. It’s not an
illusion; he can actually conjure the bunny out of the ether and he
can move the coin through space. He’s legitimately magical, but
extremely limited in scope and influence. Would this person be more
impressive than Albert Einstein?

2. Let us assume a fully grown, completely healthy Clydesdale horse
has his hooves shackled in the ground while his head is held in place
with thick rope. He is conscious and standing upright, but completely
immobile. And let us assume that . for some reason . every political
prisoner on earth (as cited by Amnesty International) will be released
from captivity if you can kick this horse to death in less than twenty
minutes. You are allowed to wear steel-toed boots. Would you do this?

3. Let us assume there are two boxes on a table. In one box, there is
a relatively normal turtle; in the other, Adolf Hitler’s skull. You
have to select one of these items for your home. If you select the
turtle, you can’t give it away and you have to keep it alive for two
years; if either of these parameters are not met, you will be fined
$999 by the state. If you select Hitler’s skull, you are required to
display it in a semi-prominent location in your living room for the
same amount of time, although you will be paid a stipend of $120 per
month for doing so. Display of the skull must be apolitical. Which
option do you select?

Read more questions

#803501 +(971)- [X]
< Somebody241> i was playing XBL yesterday
< Somebody241> and i was playing wit my friend
< Somebody241> and im sure hes maried and everything
< Somebody241> And all of a sudden
< Somebody241> His wife comes on the mic and says
< Somebody241> “Can my husband quit the game so we can have sex?”
< Somebody241> and then some lil 9 year old in my team says “Sure just leave the mic on”

What do all of these words have in common?

Banana
Dresser
Grammar
Potato
Revive
Uneven
Assess

Highlight between the stars for the answer

*

Take the first letter, place it at the end of the word, and it spells the same word backwards!

*

via b&p